Be Your Own Best Friend

One of the things I hear time and time again from folks in the chronic illness community is that people feel alone.  How close friendships and sometimes romantic relationships struggle and even often times end. Leaving us angry at them. Feeling like they’ve wronged us. Maybe they have. Maybe they haven’t really wronged us so much as they just aren’t equipped to handle our situation with us. 

It hurts. A lot. Especially when a significant other or lifelong friend “don’t understand”; it feels like they don’t care or that they don’t believe you; or they offer toxic positivity that’s just not realistic. Maybe they don’t believe us, understand, or even care to. Maybe they can’t. Honestly, how could they? No one can know what it feels like unless they’ve been in the same situation. Sometimes, they’re also still in a phase in their lives where they can’t see past their own situation and their circumstances to have the ability to be there for us. Maybe, they never will. 

It hurts. A lot. I’ve learned that, in spite of chronic illness, friendships and relationships sometimes just need to end. We all grow (or don’t grow) at different rates. We all have different experiences that shape our own unique lens for viewing the world. All of these culminate to then set us on our paths in our journey and those paths are not always the same or in the same direction. 

It hurts. A lot. And that’s OK. It’s a loss worth grieving. Grieve it. Accept it. Move on. Find a way through. Your health and mental well-being will undoubtedly be better for it. 

You know who will ALWAYS be there for you?

You. 

If we’re lucky and life goes in the “natural order” of things, you are the only relationship you will have for your entire life. Make sure you’re building THAT relationship. Be proud of your accomplishments. Honor your failures. Celebrate even the smallest wins. Accept every setback. Treat yourself the way you treat your best friends. Be your own best friend. Rest when you must. Push yourself when you can. Cry when you need to. Laugh because it’s good medicine. 

Do whatever you must to take care of you. You’re the only one that really will.

Persevere. Rock on.

💋🤘🏻