Nothing Is Carved in Stone

The bad isn’t necessarily the new norm when it happens.

In 2015, between April and September, I drove over 10,000 miles up and down the east coast. I could drive for 12+ hours a day without much of an issue. I’d stop every few hours, snack, stretch, and get back on the road.

By August of 2016 that was not possible. I was in a cycle where my exhaustion was high and driving for just a few hours would wipe me out and I could easily fall asleep at the wheel.

In February of 2017 I trekked across Florida to see a new rheumatologist because traveling back to MD to The Johns Hopkins Scleroderma The Johns Hopkins Scleroderma Center just didn’t seem feasible anymore. The drive (roughly 4 hours) there went OK. I saw the doctor, grabbed a hotel for the night and trekked back the next day. The return drive was a struggle. By the time I got home I was a hot mess. Exhausted. Sad. Angry. Crying. Thinking I could no longer be a road warrior.

In the last three months I have had to make two more trips to the clinic for follow ups and routine testing. On both trips, I have been able to make the trip there and back in the same day. Yesterday’s trip was a little more exhausting because I decided to road test the new barn truck. It’s not easy to drive any vehicle these days because of my hands and shoulder issues, and yet, with the right tools, adaptations, etc., I won’t be stopping anytime soon! I have shit to do in this life and I have to keep this body moving to do it!

The day following each trip has been an almost 100% down day because my energy levels have been depleted, I’m a tad more achey than I have been prior to the trips and, well, because I know that I need the downtime .... balance.

I have another trip back in just over a week and I am considering staying the night on this trip. No point in pushing the envelope if I don’t have to. 

Today though, I rest after yesterday’s trek, happily reminding myself, nothing is set in stone. To not count myself out of things because...it isn’t over til it’s over .... and it isn’t over yet!!

Persevere. Rock on, Slayers. Rock. On.