Sleepin' tight

Monday, August 23, 2010 1 Comments A+ a-

without Ambien!

I've been a slave to Ambien for about 6 years now. 

Right after chemo, I started not sleeping.  I was up all hours of the night, contemplating the meaning of life.  Stressing because it was ___ o'clock in the morning and I had to get up in ____ hours for work.  Sometimes, this would turn into full blown melt downs.  Crying and sobbing the bathroom because I was tired.  I knew I needed to sleep.  I knew I'd be exhausted for work.  I knew I'd finally fall asleep just minutes before the alarm went off.

When I started Ambien, it helped a lot.  The problem was, sometimes it wouldn't kick in for a little bit.  Then I was out cold for at least 8 hours.  Maybe more.  There was no waking me.  The house could have burned down.  Someone could have broken in and robbed us blind.  I'd have slept through it.

Regardless, being able to sleep was far more important to me, so Ambien became my savior.  Without it, I didn't sleep.  I'd seriously be up all night long.

Recently, I've discovered I was doing things online via my phone, in my Ambien sleep.  I wouldn't get out of bed and go anywhere, I just posted Facebook messages, or sent emails and didn't remember doing it the next day.

This bothered me a bit.  So, I wanted to stop taking it.  I want to be a normal person, who sleeps at night, without taking medication.

I was going to stop cold turkey, but at the urging of a friend, I decided to wait until I discussed it with my doctor first.  Just in case there might be any side effects.

I went to my July checkup and totally forgot to ask.  So, I was going to wait until I go back in October.  Then, due to insurance issues when I tried to get it refilled, I decided, this was as goo a time as any.  When the pharmacy said it was going to cost $53 dollars for less than a weeks worth of pills to get me through our out of town trip, I said, this is it.  I'm done.  It's not first time I've had insurance and pharmacy issues for this medication.

I'm tired of the struggle.  I'm tired of the cost.  I'm tired of depending on another med to sleep.  I emailed the doc to confirm it was ok.  He said, I could stop and take it as needed.  So, it has been 1 week and 2 days that I have slept without Ambien.  I saved the last few pills I had, just in case I have a rough night, but, so far, so good!


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August 23, 2010 at 10:12 PM delete

Good for you!! It's the little battles that make us big winners. I have a dear friend who went through rehab a few years ago. Her counselor told her that Ambien is one of the most addictive prescriptions out there. She compared it to heroin.